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Monday, August 20th, 2007
A few weeks ago there was a bridge collapse here in Minneapolis. It was certainly a bizarre occurance, to say the least. It got me to thinking about things because it was so close. Please do not get me wrong, things like this (or worse) happen all the time all over the world but it never really seems particularly real because they always happen "way over there." Strange, exotic places that I have never been to, catastrophic things that I have never experienced so even though I have a powerful imagination and pride myself on my ability to see different perspectives, I really have no true conception. Even with 9-11 this was true. I have never been to New York, I had never seen the WTC with my own eyes. I was shocked, amazed, confounded, and more but it did not hit me.
The bridge collapse happend only a few days after a trying weekend. A slow build-up of tension was brought to a head when I was shut down by security while trying to take pictures of the city from atop a parking garage by the Seven Corners Holiday Inn. So close to finally getting the project in the bag after having the idea stewing in my head for a couple years and I get shut down. Down, but not defeated, I get back to my apartment suitably pissed off.
A short few days later the bridge collapsed.
I was in the computer lab at Ai when I heard about it, about two miles away from it. It was, of course, the talk of the school. I was talking to the other students in the lab but the thoughts in my head kept going elsewhere. To the people I care about that could have been on that bridge, to the fact that I could have been on that bridge. My concern for the strangers involved were dwarfed by my concern for the people I love. This should be no surprise but sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with my heart for having thoughts like that. That is, a general lack of real concern for all the strangers out there.
Yeah yeah, human life is special and should be cherished blah blah. Whatever. Sure, I have a general affection for humanity and want for us to evolve and do great things but the fact is that there are a lot of goddamn people on this planet and I really cannot be "all about" every one of them, it is impossible. So there, I simply do not care about a lot of people on this planet.
So what does this have to do with anything?
Well, as I mentioned earlier the proximity of it made me rethink some things. About the unexpected, about life, about how fragile it really is. If you stop to consider it for a moment, it does not take much to make it go away. You could slip and hit your head, you could choke on a hot-dog, get hit by a rock spit from a lawn mower, a bridge could fall on your ass, a plane could crash into a building, some nutjob could strap 20 pounds of C4 to his nuts.
You just never know. Because of that, there is no time to waste when it comes to doing the things you want to do or saying the things you want to say. Throw caution to the wind. This is nothing new. Tons of people have said this shit before far more eloquently than I have. I have been told however that I have issues communicating how I feel. To which I say:
I love you.
richter
Monday, August 20th, 2007
A few weeks ago there was a bridge collapse here in Minneapolis. It was certainly a bizarre occurance, to say the least. It got me to thinking about things because it was so close. Please do not get me wrong, things like this (or worse) happen all the time all over the world but it never really seems particularly real because they always happen "way over there." Strange, exotic places that I have never been to, catastrophic things that I have never experienced so even though I have a powerful imagination and pride myself on my ability to see different perspectives, I really have no true conception. Even with 9-11 this was true. I have never been to New York, I had never seen the WTC with my own eyes. I was shocked, amazed, confounded, and more but it did not hit me.
The bridge collapse happend only a few days after a trying weekend. A slow build-up of tension was brought to a head when I was shut down by security while trying to take pictures of the city from atop a parking garage by the Seven Corners Holiday Inn. So close to finally getting the project in the bag after having the idea stewing in my head for a couple years and I get shut down. Down, but not defeated, I get back to my apartment suitably pissed off.
A short few days later the bridge collapsed.
I was in the computer lab at Ai when I heard about it, about two miles away from it. It was, of course, the talk of the school. I was talking to the other students in the lab but the thoughts in my head kept going elsewhere. To the people I care about that could have been on that bridge, to the fact that I could have been on that bridge. My concern for the strangers involved were dwarfed by my concern for the people I love. This should be no surprise but sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with my heart for having thoughts like that. That is, a general lack of real concern for all the strangers out there.
Yeah yeah, human life is special and should be cherished blah blah. Whatever. Sure, I have a general affection for humanity and want for us to evolve and do great things but the fact is that there are a lot of goddamn people on this planet and I really cannot be "all about" every one of them, it is impossible. So there, I simply do not care about a lot of people on this planet.
So what does this have to do with anything?
Well, as I mentioned earlier the proximity of it made me rethink some things. About the unexpected, about life, about how fragile it really is. If you stop to consider it for a moment, it does not take much to make it go away. You could slip and hit your head, you could choke on a hot-dog, get hit by a rock spit from a lawn mower, a bridge could fall on your ass, a plane could crash into a building, some nutjob could strap 20 pounds of C4 to his nuts.
You just never know. Because of that, there is no time to waste when it comes to doing the things you want to do or saying the things you want to say. Throw caution to the wind. This is nothing new. Tons of people have said this shit before far more eloquently than I have. I have been told however that I have issues communicating how I feel. To which I say:
I love you.
richter